Tuesday, November 16, 2004

I'm back in my safe place where I never have to wait for the phone to ring, where everyone hangs on my very word, heck! They queue up for it! and I am loved and appreciated for just being me and doing what I do well.

Ok! So maybe it's not so great to return to 182 emails, 32 voicemails (thank goodness it has a limit) and enough post and typed messages to keep a fire going for a month and 3 days ( if you used the Ray Mears approach it would be 13 years 4 months and 23.5 days). It took me til Noon just to wade through the paperless stuff - small miracle that I managed to bash off another 8 tapes, answer 48 calls,see 1 client ( she didn't have an appointment, didn't need to see me, but I like her), welcome Rachel into the fold, show her around, make my own coffee once ( the only one I had all day), and still have time to think about Cute at least twice every hour.

That's a huge improvement. I only thought about him - didn't think about contacting him!

I think I must have one of these 21st Century diseases. Allergic to holidays! They certainly don't seem to agree with me. Last time I was in a car-crash. This time I lose my security of tenure, my possible romance and almost my mind. It's enough to make you want to stay at work!

Fortunately, being a girl that still has a faint grip, I realise that I can and should get my own place - I had always intended to do it but probably needed a large boot between my bowling balls to finally get around to calling a mortgage advisor and setting the balls in motion (they will offer me silly, daft, idiotic money - now how many shoes could I buy with that?) and the relationship-that-never-was would probably still have never been even if I hadn't fucked it up before it started - it would just have taken me longer and probably have cost me more than a cheap lunch and a dried-up Spag Bol.

So instead, I had a wonderful evening with a very charming and selfless man, got to wear a dress that I never dreamed would fit my sides again ( Sorry, Peter, but I did put it second), and got myself invited to the Lions Charter Dinner! Now the whole sorry crisis starts again! I have to find a date again!!! Aaaaaaarrggggggghhh!

I shall mostly be wearing pin-stripes this week!

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