I watched a programme on the telly tonight where a woman basically said everything there is to summarise me - we can appear to be having a hugely successful life and everyone can think we are really sorted but it can be one slight comment or perceived rejection and we are in a flat spin!

Ok - so the script-writer put it more succinctly but it hit home. I'm doing great, I am great, my life is one long charm, but I don't feel so great- at least not today - or this week even.

I should - I have a healthy son, bank-balance and the scales are going down - I even toyed with a Chinese tonight but settled on Mackerel on toast - but He hasn't called!!!!

I can think of numerous reasons why he hasn't, but they would all be excuses. If he was that bothered he'd have phoned. I can think of hundreds of reasons why he hasn't - none of them rational - well perhaps my thighs are too large, my tits too wobbly, and my gob too loud - I knew I shouldn't have worn that dress in his company - but I keep coming back to the fact that when I like a bloke his size, dress sense or age doesn't matter - ok - so he has to have a nice car and good dental hygiene, but otherwise as long as he can make me laugh he's pretty much on to a winner.

I'm not getting despondent - I'm getting confident - I have a number of men wanting to be on my quiz team - and who can blame them! Miss I-Completed-The-Sunday-Times-Crossword Last-Week! And I'll firm up that date with a friend of a friend. I'm also toying with the idea of using my 60 seconds to tout for a new bloke on Thursday morning - who'll know! it will all be on expenses.

But I feel a bit empty - I really like him and there are 101 things that happen through the average day that I want to share with him - most of which portray me as a fabulous glamorous business goddess, admittedly - if only he knew my vulnerable side!