Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Once a Non-Bridesmaid...

What exactly are a non-bridesmaid's duties? You'd think it would comprise mainly of not getting off with the best man ( in this case the 11-year-old Godson, which would be so wrong on a number of levels) and maybe not being toasted in the speeches. The reverse of that is pretty much all a proper, official bridesmaid has to do, after all. That and not allow herself to be chosen 3 times, if she ever has hopes of being a bride herself. ( I was bridesmaid for my cousin and both parents, at seperate weddings).

You wouldn't necessarily expect, as a non-bridesmaid, to be helping the groom and the best man get dressed, straighten their ties, unpick the stitching in their pockets, defluff them of any stray cat hairs ( from their own cats, not a stray's), take custody of the cards to be read out, attach their button holes, then shoot over to the hotel to soothe the blushered bride, dish out the button holes to the official wedding party, zip the bride tightly into her dress, commandeer golf buggies for wobbly grandparents, be within a hand's reach for tissues/ lipgloss/ eyeliner at every moment, and most importantly, bear the weight of the dress while the bride sits on her throne. I was so relieved when she declared that she was capable of pulling her own pants down.

It's a wonder only this Cinderella's heel snapped.

Rachel - if you are reading this, I loved every minute of it and am proud you trusted me to be such a big part of your special day xxx


Blogger ziggi said...

you've got the job - what you doing Oct 6?

7:13 am  
Blogger Dave said...

Did you get a tip?

9:43 am  
Blogger Cherrypie said...

Ziggi- hopefully not helping you go to the toilet.

Dave - I did better than that. I got a bottle of bubbly, a box of chocs, a boquet of red roses and a dinner service ( her old one).

11:47 am  
Blogger ziggi said...

No, I can usually manage even at my advanced age as long as someone reminds me.

1:39 pm  
Blogger homo escapeons said...

Now you can apply to be a handmaiden at Buckingham!

Sounds fantastic..but then I knew that wherever you go, you make livin' fun.

What news, pray tell, have you of the proverbial 'you're next' bouquet lobbed into the frenzied vortex of single gals?
Chick Fight!

1:42 am  

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