And Relax...

Supple. That's what they used to call me. They called me a few other things too but the toilet walls have long since been painted over and those who do remember are probably now married and would never dare risk their wives finding out.

Flexibility was something I took for granted. I thought everyone could do the splits and walk like a crab. Bendyness just never entered my consciousness because I was never conscious of it.

I only notice it now it's not there in anything like its former quantities and I mourn its passing and curse my neglectfulness.

I can still get into the crab position. I just can't get out of it. Not elegantly or without a lot of swearing and some assistance. I can't get my toes to touch my eyebrows from the back of my head anymore and I can only chew the big toenail on one foot ( my right).

I discovered this after my first yoga class. It's been 3 weeks and I already have a rather lovely dog of which I am quite fond, a Natarajasana that is never going to win me any prizes on Come Dancing, a Tree, well-rooted just above my knee but quite some way off my groin and half a gibous moon. In fact, I'm getting so confident, I may even start eating baked beans again in a few months time.